I am delighted that I can offer support for couples. Couples counselling has a dynamic field of research, and my approach builds on the evidence based Emotional Focused Model, integrating this with mindfulness.
Couples therapy differs significantly from individual therapy, having the ‘relationship’ as the focus of work, not either of the individuals.
Characteristics of Couples therapy
- When the relationship is the focus, the individuals can see more clearly how they might contribute to a pattern of behaviour that is repeated and which often ends in conflict or ‘stuckness’.
- Couples therapy helps a partnership to recognise each other’s emotions, as well as their own.
- The process nurtures empathy rather than competition.
- When there is empathy the couples can recognise they each have a strong desire for acceptance and unconditional love.
- The therapy explores the different emotional responses that can be provoked in the repetitive cycles that occur in the relationship
- When patterns of behaviour have been identified and understood there can be change.
- We also pay attention to positive experiences and build on these.
- Therapy is likely to include practising, compromising, and acceptance.
- Homework is often a part of the process, usually practising new ways of communicating.
- Couples therapy in NOT about ‘fixing’ your partner.
If, during the initial assessment process or in the course of the work it is apparent that one person has a personal issue that is impacting on the couple’s work, such as past trauma, or drug abuse, it will be advised that the individual has personal therapy to help. Couples work might be stopped or paused at this time, and it is usual for the individual to seek help elsewhere.
Couples Therapy and Mindfulness
I will incorporate the attitudes of mindfulness in my work, especially focusing on being with the present moment. If couples wish to incorporate or develop their own mindfulness practice this can be useful in noticing and not reacting to emotions.
If as a couple, you want to learn mindfulness as a way of being I can provide bespoke packages.